Emotionally Unstable (Empath Chronicles #2) Read online

  He was looking unsure about the whole being-back-at-school thing. And I knew he was here mostly for my benefit, but I hoped he would get something out of it too. I mean, it was high school, but it was a good high school with some good kids and teachers I even liked, like Mr. Jones, who we had first up that morning for history.

  As we walked into the class, Mr. Jones tapped me on the shoulder and said, “Glad you’re back. Was worried when you disappeared on us that night.”

  “Sorry about that. I hope my parents explained everything.” I ducked past before he could reply, and took a seat near the middle of the room next to an empty desk for Dean. He paused to introduce himself to the teacher and hand over some paperwork.

  Ash slipped right into what should have been Dean’s chair. Ugh. I should have put something on it to claim it. I wasn’t thinking straight with the rainbow of emotional auras creating a haze in the room, including the bright sunshine yellow beaming from Ash as he grinned at me.

  I shot Dean a look of apology as he moved to another available desk behind me.

  It was still close enough to get a decent blocking effect, but I silently cursed Ash for meaning I couldn’t have Dean at my side.

  He didn’t seem to notice and, still smiling, started talking in a strong Australian accent. “Hey, you new to this place too? I’m Ash.”

  “Livvy,” I said, busy getting my textbooks in order. “And I’m not new. Just been away for a while.”

  “Yeah? Where to? On holiday?” His grin stayed large. He was as cheery as a kid’s TV host. He glowed almost too bright to look at.

  I rubbed my forehead and turned to the front of the classroom, trying to make a point of paying attention to Mr. Jones who had begun the lesson on the smart board. Something about an assassination causing World War I. I was behind on the details there. I glanced to the side and Ash was still staring at me, waiting for an answer.

  “In hospital,” I hissed.

  “Whoa. What happened?” He sat sideways on his chair to face me better and looked me up and down, as if seeking clues as to my illness or injury. “Was it serious?”

  I shot him a glare. Was he trying to get us both in trouble? Why so many questions? Maybe I could have avoided an interrogation if I’d lied and said I had been on vacation, but that wasn’t the plan. Stick to the script. Stay consistent. Or just avoid giving busy-bodies any unnecessary information entirely.

  “I’m fine now. Shh.” I tilted my head to Mr. Jones who seemed to have noticed our conversation. I had my pen in hand, trying to take notes, but between Ash’s prying and the distracting buzz of emotions swarming through my body like angry ants, I was having trouble concentrating.

  “You look knackered. Sure you’re not still feeling a bit off? Or is it because it’s so cold in here?” Ash continued looking straight at me. Like he was oblivious to the rest of the room. Or to me being annoyed. Or the increasingly bewildered teacher who stared right at him, tapping his foot.

  “Ash Len,” Mr. Jones snapped. “Private conversations are for outside the classroom. If you feel the need to talk so much, maybe you can go have a chat to the principal.”

  “Sorry, Mr. Jones,” he said, his cheery grin still in place. “I’m just so excited to be in this new school, with so many interesting new people to meet.”

  Confused laughter swept across the room, as though the class was unsure if this guy was trying to be a clown or not.

  Mr. Jones also looked bewildered at Ash’s behavior. It seemed almost arrogant or cheeky, like he was the kind of person used to getting away with anything. His comment about it being cold popped back up in my memory’s ear. Huh. I narrowed my eyes, my suspicions twitching.

  Mr. Jones cleared his throat. “Well, some more interest in the lesson would be appreciated.”

  “Sure thing, mate,” Ash said, turning himself to the front of the room again, pen in hand, head down.

  He didn’t talk to me again for the rest of the lesson, but every time I glanced across at him, he was also glancing right back at me from under his straight white hair. Grinning. Not taking any notes.

  The school bus stop was a swell of jostling teenage bodies, wired from a day in school and ready to be free. A couple of supervising teachers near the gates kept trying to remind us to stay calmly in our bus lines but it was futile. Between the hot tin roof and the concrete floor, students dueled in games of handball or huddled together, streaming funny videos on their phones or taking selfies. In the corners farthest from the teachers, couples pressed their bodies together, making out or just staring dreamily into each other’s eyes.

  My gaze drifted up to Dean beside me. He stood close, with his shoulder pressed against mine, but there wasn’t that intimacy or rush of lust between us that the other teenage couples seemed to have. At least not in the Dean-to-Livvy direction. In the Livvy-to-Dean direction, just a glimpse of those intense gray eyes made my whole body whimper. But I held back, uncertainty a wall of ice between us. Were we even a couple? Was it always going to be this hard to know how Dean was feeling? Would I always doubt us?

  Dean caught me staring, and without saying a word, he wrapped his hand around mine. There he goes being a mind reader again. But Mom always did say I had a face like an open book.

  His hand felt good in mine, and the flutters in my heart grew fierce as a tornado.

  “You two are so cute together. Like Romeo and Juliet, except ones who kicked death in the ass!” Nati had proclaimed during chemistry class. She had gasped all the way through my explanation of my absence, how I’d gotten caught up with a gang, the bank robbery, and the fact Dean had been shot. Gasps were punctuated with a lot of ‘No way!’ and ‘Shut up!’ She ate up every detail, her eyes sparkling with a fierce, protective awe.

  After class, it was like she didn’t want to let me out of her sight, offering to drive us both home even though it was out of her way. I declined, happy to catch the bus and return to normal routines.

  Our bus pulled up out the front of the gates, and kids started filing into line, pushing through the rest of the swirling crowd of students to get on. Just before reaching the gate, Dean’s hand slipped out of mine and another student pushed in between us. Then my wrist was grabbed again from behind. A sharp tug pulled me out of line.

  “Hey, Livvy! It’s Livvy, isn’t it? I’ve met so many people today, it’s a bit of a blur.” Ash grinned at me. He let go of my wrist and I just nodded to him, trying to head back to the bus as the last student in line got on.

  He grabbed my shoulder and stopped me from walking away. I knew I was stronger than him, but didn’t want him to also know that, so I let him get away with it. “Ash, I have to go.”

  “I wanted to ask you something,” he persisted.

  “Dude, that’s my bus,” I snapped at him.

  I heard the whoosh of the bus doors closing. I turned to find Dean, and spotted him on the bus as it pulled away. Without me.

  Chapter Three

  Dean stood in the aisle of the bus. He’d noticed I wasn’t behind him anymore, and looked out the window. Our eyes met, both wide with fear.

  Down around the back of the covered bus shelter, I heard raised voices, as a couple of girls started pushing each other around. The buzz of emotions from my fellow classmates was building up in me. Fast. I had to get to Dean. I really didn’t want to be seizuring out in front of everyone on my first day back at school. Or at all.

  Ash still held my shoulder, saying something I wasn’t paying any attention to.

  I stepped out of Ash’s grip, pushing him back at the same time, and left him stumbling with a look of sheer astonishment on his face.

  I ducked quickly between the other students, sidestepping behind some larger bodies until I was out of sight of Ash and any watching teachers, then slipped away behind the covered shelter walls.

  The street was visible through the thick bars of the school fence, and a row of busses had stopped just outside, waiting for the green light. My bus was one of them.

/>   I had to get to it. And I had to do it without totally revealing my powers.

  I dashed to a section of fence where bushes grew on either side, hoping they’d be enough to obscure the view if anyone was watching me run around the schoolyard like a weirdo.

  Giving the fence a calculating glare, I ran straight at it. I moved fast—there was obviously enough fear around for me to use. I hoped there was also enough anger, so I’d have the strength to make the jump. I judged my moment and leaped. The tops of the metal bars skimmed the soles of my shoes. Dirt swirled as I landed behind the leafy bush, feet firm and heart pounding.

  But the bus was already pulling away again, down the street.

  I ran along not far behind, trying to keep out of direct view of people on the street and the vehicle’s windows. Thank goodness school was in a quiet part of town. I ducked behind parked cars then sprinted ahead in a blur of speed when the coast was clear. It wasn’t hard keeping up with the bus at first, but I knew just around the corner they’d be moving into a faster speed zone and I wasn’t sure if I’d make that pace while staying covert. I needed to get in the bus.

  Or maybe on the bus ...

  Just around the corner was a billboard truck that had been there for months, advertising a new dental surgery. I just hoped they hadn’t moved it.

  I rounded the corner, anxiously scanning for it and—there. Yes! It was still there. The slope of the double-sided A-frame billboard was steeper than I’d remembered, almost straight up and down. My shoes had basic rubber soles that I hoped would give me enough traction, because this was my last chance to get on the bus, and not get a seizure in the gutter.

  I gunned it, using every bit of speed and strength I could muster. It felt like I was running at a wall, but when I reached it, I scrambled up the face of the white-toothed grinning woman on the ad, toes and hands moving together to pull me up to the top. And there was the bus in front of me, just in front of me and starting to accelerate.

  I didn’t slow down. I pushed off with both feet and sprang from the top of the billboard, my hair flying about as the world disappeared from under me. My chest tightened. I’m up in the air. It was amazing. And terrifying. Please let me come down in the right place.

  I landed neatly on top of the bus in a crouched action pose, and couldn’t help but smile.

  I did it. Now that was superhero stuff. I felt like I had flown through the sky, and my heart raced faster than I had.

  I dropped down onto my stomach. It wouldn’t pay to have anyone see a teenage girl riding a bus around like a skateboard. After catching my breath, I slid over to the edge, ducking down to look through a window. Dean stood up the front. He seemed to be arguing with the bus driver who waved him back, probably telling him to take a seat. With the bus on its way, it wouldn’t come back for students who’d missed it, or let anyone off outside of a designated stop.

  The other students seemed too involved in their own conversations or phones to be looking my way, so I took a chance and waved to get Dean’s attention.

  Halfway through a sentence, his eyes turned my way and he stopped, mouth open. I grinned, giving him a thumbs up. He said something else to the driver then took a seat, eyebrows raised at my upside-down face.

  Another kid turned my way, and I moved out of sight. I took off my backpack and flipped over onto my back to watch the blue sky for the rest of the ride home, pretending I was still flying.

  When the bus pulled up on our street, I waited for Dean to get off, and then jumped down off the back of the bus as it left, landing out of sight behind a gray van.

  “What happened?” Dean came over to me. “I thought you were right behind me, getting on the bus. Then you weren’t. I tried to get them to stop but the driver wouldn’t listen.”

  “I know. It’s okay, I was held up by someone, but did you see me? I was so fast, like so fast, and I jumped onto a fleeping bus. Right onto it!” My empath powers had calmed again now I was beside Dean, but my heart and mind were still in crazy-excited mode. “I went full superhero.”

  We started the walk up the street to my house, and I skipped around Dean as he half-smiled at my enthusiasm.

  “I don’t know if I’ve ever run like that before. Or jumped! Or landed! Do you know how I landed? Not on my face! It was like POW.” I demonstrated by jumping a little on the spot and landing in an action pose.

  “You are such a huge dork.” But Dean smiled, as though he really liked it.

  Mom met us at the front door. I bet she’d been hovering. She knew I’d been worried about my first day back at school. “How was it?” she asked.

  I tried to contain my grin. Pure nonchalance. “It was fine. No dramas at all.”

  I rapped my knuckles lightly against Dean’s door. Mom and Dad were watching a movie in the living room downstairs. Dean and I were meant to be catching up on homework before bed. Separately, in our own rooms, because it was after dinner.

  I’d had a soothing bath and changed into pajamas and tried to relax and just focus on studying.

  But the excitement of today still zipped through my veins. I couldn’t stop thinking about the race I’d run, the sensation of flying, and the way Dean had held my hand in the bus shelter. So I had fearlessly snuck down the hallway, desperate to see Dean to have someone to share those feelings with.

  I heard some shuffling but the door didn’t open. I didn’t dare knock louder, so I pushed the sliding door open a crack and peeked in. Dean was sitting cross-legged on the sofa bed, wearing only gray sweat-pants, reading a paperback.

  My breath caught and my cheeks heated. I almost backed away, but Dean looked up and rested the book on the bed, like a sign it was okay for me to interrupt. I stepped in and closed the door behind me, careful not to make a sound.

  “Isn’t this against the rules?” he whispered.

  I answered by grinning mischievously and wriggling my eyebrows.

  Dean didn’t share my delinquent delight. He reached across and grabbed a shirt, pulling it on quickly. “I don’t want to get in trouble off your parents.”

  “I just wanted to chat.” My enthusiasm dropped quickly. For all I could tell, Dean didn’t want me there. But I could never really tell what he wanted, or if he wanted. What would this situation be like with a normal boy?

  I almost bit my tongue. Normal? I’d never been the type to want normal.

  I sat next to Dean and studied his face, his skin smooth and pale like no laugh lines had ever marred it. Those gray eyes looked like they could be thunderstorms but held none of that wild energy.

  I could never sense his emotions. What he was feeling. If he felt at all. But I knew his heart. I’d once felt the pain he held so deep in there. I knew his kindness. I knew he felt something for me. It was just hard to tell exactly what and how much when he didn’t show it.

  I found myself lost for words after having just said I wanted to chat. Ugh, so awkward. I picked up the book he was reading. It was a space opera classic, probably off one of the shelves in the room. One of Dad’s favorites. “You like reading?”

  “Yeah. It helps me shut out the things around me, to escape.” He coughed softly. “And it was easy to find cheap second-hand paperbacks back at home.”

  “Paperbacks? Haven’t you discovered e-books yet? You can borrow my e-reader if you want since I mostly read on my phone. I have so many books in my collection,” I said as my mind served up the image of Dean’s tiny trailer room. Even his phone looked pre-smart-phone era. He had been working to support himself and his alcoholic dad, and there I was, boasting about my e-book collection and how many devices I had. Including the brand-new phone my parents had given me while I was in hospital since my own phone had been left behind and the one Jake got me had become evidence. Me, who had been so excited by the idea of affluence and opulence that I got involved with criminals.

  Thankfully, Dean didn’t seem as mortified by me at that moment as I was. He just said, “Sure, sounds good,” as I tried to get my brain functioning in
an acceptable way.

  My life had changed so much. My eyes had been opened so wide, I felt like I didn’t know how to exist anymore. Like I couldn’t be the person I used to be. But my identity hadn’t quite caught up with that memo yet, hadn’t grown into it. I was a toddler wearing her dad’s Superman costume.

  And then there was Dean, who made me want to be worthy of a love he might never be able to express. How was I supposed to act around him?

  My mind was muddled. What had originally been planned as a fun secret meet-up was turning into a confusing mess. What had I wanted, really, when I snuck down here?

  “Are you,” I started, hesitantly, “having trouble feeling normal again?”

  Dean’s eyes were on mine, and I wondered if he’d been studying my face the way I had his. “Yeah. I’m not sure how normal I ever felt, but yeah, I know I’ve changed, from who I was before all this. You?”

  I bit my lip and nodded. “And it’s not just the powers. I mean, it’s hard to feel normal when you have super strength and speed, and who knows what else. But other things too. I feel ... different. In a good way, but also a way I just don’t know how to make work yet.”

  Dean nodded.

  We sat in silence and I considered reaching out and taking his hand, or leaning my head on his shoulder. Instead, I reached over and placed my palm on his shirt, so gently it was barely a touch at all. Through the thin material, I felt the plasticky square of post-op dressing covering his bullet wound. The action moved us closer. Dean’s breath ghosted over my cheek.

  I whispered, “Are you feeling a bit better?”

  “Yeah.” Dean looked down at my hand. “I was worried about you on the bus today. When you didn’t get on, I just kept imagining you on the ground, hurting.”